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Television and New Year’s Eve icon Dick Clark passed away at the age of 82. It truly is sad because I’m struggling to figure out when it is acceptable to tell a dick joke again. I guess it is now.
Did you hear about the 2Pac Hologram that appeared at Coachella ? Of course you did. People have been so shocked about it that they are acting like it melted off their face like they saw the contents of the arc of the covenant.
The worst part about this 2Pac hologram is that its going to start this new fad of everyone being brought back to life in hologram form. I wouldn’t be surprised if Ryan Seacrest tries to hologram Dick Clark on top of Time’s Square Cyrstal Ball. Look, there is Dick on top of the ball coming down the shaft. Dick joke #2!
Did you hear that Kim Kardashian has aspirations to become Mayor of Glendale, CA. Does Michael Clarke Duncan have the best reaction to that news ever?
Wait a minute, Michael Clarke Duncan is engaged to Omarosa . Dude just dropped a hundred levels in my book.
I may do an internet show for about 10 people on my toliet but at least I can hold it together saying words like “dyngus” and”pussy willow” something that CNN’s Anderson Cooper struggles with .